Hairdos, but mostly hairdon'ts

My laptop's power cord stopped working again for the 4th time in 5 months, so I've been without my computer, and also without Mary Worth, for nearly a week and a half. My dear friend Becky was gracious enough to read the strip to me over the phone because I was getting somewhat edgy not knowing how Toby's fraud ordeal was progressing. I really didn't miss that much though - all Toby has managed to accomplish is a quick swim and listening to her voice mail over the last 10 or so days.

Anyways, although it might be less scary to forget that we saw Ian's chest hair, we cannot, and it really should be talked about. This post pales in comparison to the Milford Pantheon of Hair, but it is a necessary discussion nevertheless.



I expected Ian to have either no chest hair or tons, sprouting out the top of his casual banded polos. It's surprisingly sparse.

According to the Beard Chart on this page (Should males wear a beard? Should Ian wear a beard?), Ian's style is called a chin curtain. I approve.

Here's the 7-strand comb over that many of you have pointed out - why even try, really?

The flat-ironed Dorothy Hamill:


Not only do we get the 7-Stranded Wonder here, but also the unfortunate result of a mishap involving a 1994 guide to hairstyles, scissors, and the infamous Bag o' Drugs:


I'll add more as I come across them, or if you can think of a particular style that should be here, by all means, please let me know.

Nothing says "husband material" like a banded bottom polo (in a 60/40% cotton/poly blend)

Oh boy, do I love men in banded polos! Obviously, men who take the time to select such a fashionable yet classic piece are relaxed and approachable but know the value of being crisp, clean, and presentable. Banded polos are not just for teen-agers anymore, but look great on the mature set, as they add a dash of youthfulness while maintaining a respectable image. You can never go wrong with a banded polo.




Don't forget that banded polos are always a great addition to Sansabelt jeans!

The Houndstooth from Hell

I imagine there was a lone bolt of houndstooth polyblend collecting dust in the corner of a discount store when the executive seamstress of Santa Royale purchased it. Now, as evidenced in the above panel, the fabric does not look terrible when used to upholster. It would also have made some nice placemats, chefs’ aprons, or even window treatments. But no, it became some rather offensive sports jackets and at least one skirt. Why? Why?

A Remarkable Lack of Plackets

Here we have men’s placketless varsity jackets – faux raglan sleeves give this jacket a youthful feel while the lack of placket and front closure allow for maximum freedom of movement. A perfect choice for heated hospital rows, this jacket says, “Even though I probably won’t, I could sock you at any moment because my arms are not restricted by unnecessary details, like buttons or zippers.”

Also, it's rather obvious that Mary’s personality is so magnetic that her jackets stay closed without conventional closures.